How Will I Know If I Have Postpartum Depression? Plus, One Mother's Story
Postpartum depression (commonly shortened to PPD) is believed to affect 10-20% of new mothers, yet the question "how will I know if I have postpartum depression?" is not often one that crosses the minds of new and expecting mothers. Earlier this week, we spoke with a mama in our community who has found strength in writing about her own journey with PPD, and this certainly wasn't a question she thought about when she was pregnant. We're sharing more of her story, below.
But it made us think: why is it that so many mothers are blindsided by postpartum depression when nearly 1 in 5 women will experience it?
We believe a big reason why is because we all -- as a society -- simply don't talk about it. Or maybe, most of us don't know how to talk about it. But at Baby2Body we're here to talk about everything you need to know from trying to conceive through your postpartum years, and maternal mental health is a big part of this life stage. Our hope is the more we talk about it, and the more personal stories our community shares about it, the easier it might be for you to talk about it as well.
So, what is postpartum depression?
Postpartum depression is a type of perinatal depression that affects the brain, behaviors, and physical health. While postpartum means the period after giving birth, it's important to know that symptoms of PPD can present during pregnancy. Symptoms could also start a few weeks after delivery or even months later, and unforutnately they don't often resolve on their own and require treatment from a medical professional. Postpartum depression is a mental health condition that should be treated as seriously as any debilitating physical condition. Please remember that.
How will I know if I have postpartum depression?
PPD can be tough to pinpoint early on, as the "baby blues" are a very common experience that new mothers go through (up to 80%, in fact). The baby blues are general feelings of sadness or emptiness in the first few weeks after birth, largely caused by significant hormonal fluctuations and fatigue. But if those emotions persist several weeks past birth and start to interrupt your day-to-day life, it's important to know that you could be experiencing postpartum depression. For more on that topic, check out our post, How To Tell If You Have The Baby Blues Or Postpartum Depression.
It's helpful to know what symptoms differentiate PPD from the baby blues. Common symptoms of postpartum depression, still persistent 3+ weeks after birth, include:
Extreme sadness
Overwhelming fatigue
Frequent mood swings or crying spells without warning
Feeling disinterested in your baby or things you used to enjoy
Anxiety or panic attacks
Inability to sleep or too much sleeping
Eating too much or too little
Intrusive thoughts, such as harming your baby or something bad happening to them
You don’t know why you feel disconnected or as joyful as you thought you’d feel
What factors contribute to PPD?
Hormonal fluctuations. What causes PPD isn’t exactly clear, but researchers believe the sudden hormonal fluctuation after birth may trigger postpartum depression. And "fluctuation" is an understatement... When you’re pregnant, your estrogen and progesterone are at their highest point ever, and in the 24 hours after birth they plummet back to near pre-pregnancy levels - causing powerful mood swings or low moods that may lead to PPD.
Thyroid hormones can also drop after birth and low levels can mess with your energy levels and contribute to symptoms of depression. There’s a simple blood test that can tell if this is could be an issue and medication can help manage thyroid levels.
Life stressors. Stress in our life can come from things like poor diet, lack of sleep, and significant changes to lifestyle and routine (exactly what happens when you have a newborn...). Life stressors such as financial worry, lack of emotional support, being in an abusive relationship, and drug or alcohol abuse could also be potential PPD stressors.
Other risk factors: A personal or family history of depression or mood disorder, difficult or unwanted pregnancy, having multiples or premature baby/babies with health issues, having a baby with special needs, and even difficulty breastfeeding can heighten your risk of developing postpartum depression.
If you think you have postpartum depression...
The best thing you can do is start the conversation, and ask for help. We know that this can often be the hardest part. We've written some tips for talking openly with your partner (or close friends and family) about postpartum depression, but it’s important to know everyone is different and talking with someone about your personal feelings is unique to you and your relationships. Use these tips to help you decide what works best for you.
One really important person to talk to is your doctor or healthcare professional if you feel you’re at risk for developing postpartum depression, or if you or your loved one is experiencing symptoms of depression. There are treatment options (including pregnancy-safe ones!) that your healthcare professional can talk with you about to help get you feeling like your normal self again.
Since we know that asking for help isn't always easy, we wanted to share one mother's story of postpartum depression with all of you. Knowing that someone else has experienced something similar can make it a little easier to share your own story as well.
One mother's story of postpartum depression and anxiety
Betsy reached out to us a few days ago -- in honor of mental health awareness month -- to share her story with PPD/PPA. Her words were so powerful, we knew they needed to be seen by more women in this community, because someone out there needs to know this: you're not alone. You're not crazy. You're not doing a bad job. Depression is not your fault. You deserve all the help, support, and professional treatment needed to get back to feeling like you again.
So here's a bit of Betsy's experience with postpartum depression and anxiety. She's a mama of 2, and started her blog as a therapeutic outlet, where she speaks candidly about her pregnancy and motherhood journeys:
Four years ago I took a pretty rapid descent into motherhood and during my '3 month pregnancy' (long story, he was a late discovery, oops) I was put on a crash course by all the mums I knew…
“Sleep when the baby sleeps. Fed is best. Nappy bins are pointless. The first postpartum poo is the hardest. Get yourself some big knickers. If it’s a girl wipe from front to back. If it’s a boy make sure it’s pointing down when you put the nappy on. You can’t spoil a newborn. Make sure you take time for yourself. You won’t shower for the first few days. Pack a long charger for the hospital. You’ll still look pregnant for a while after birth. Your boobs will double when your milk comes in. That first cry is the best sound. When you hold baby you’ll feel love like no other. You’ll gain a whole new perspective. You’re about to realise the true meaning of joy. There’s no love like a mother for her child. When you look at them your heart will sing…”
But I wasn’t told or warned about postpartum depression and anxiety. Both of which creeped up behind me and grabbed me round the throat, restricting me so much that most days I felt like I couldn’t breathe.
The thoughts that entered my mind weren’t just words strung together in text – they’d flash through in a reel of terrifying imagery. I didn’t think my thoughts, I saw them – often unable to distinguish between what was real and what wasn’t.
“My baby is sick. My baby is choking. My baby has turned blue. My babies chest isn’t moving. My baby is sleeping too much, sleeping too little. He’s got a rash. He’s not breathing properly. What if I drop the baby? What if I drop the baby on purpose? What if the tv falls on him? What if he falls into the sink of boiling water, or I pour kettle water on him? What if we fall down the stairs and I crush him? What if I bend his limbs too much and they break? What if I drop him in the bath and he drowns? Or I throw him out of the window, or over the balcony? What if I deliberately let him drink piping hot milk? What if that pillow falls on his face and I don’t move it? What if I let the pram go and it wheels into the road? What if someone tries to steal him? What if a stranger breaks in and tries to kill us? What if I hurt him with this kitchen knife? Or drop him on the open oven door? What if I fall asleep and suffocate him?”
“Wait, am I capable of hurting my child? Am I thinking all this because I WANT to carry these actions out? Should I call social services on myself? Am I in fact the most dangerous thing to this innocent boy? Do I love my baby? Should I actually just put him up for adoption?”
...
When I finally went to my GP and told her what was going on, I was shocked by her response.
“It’s entirely normal, it’s bloody horrible, but it happens to 1 in 5 of us. You are not alone.”
She was right, technically I wasn’t alone but as a new mother with no mum friends to reach out to I felt the loneliest I ever have. How do you tell your friends who don’t have kids that you thought people were in your flat when they weren’t… or that you fully imagined yourself stabbing your newborn child. You don’t.
Over time I learnt that yes it’s completely normal to be experiencing what I was experiencing but that didn’t make it ok – suffering in silence doesn’t help anyone. Everyone will have different coping mechanisms, things that helped me were indeed talking to people… some won’t want to talk and that’s ok, often when it comes to mental illness we don’t know what to say.
...
Maternal mental illness is still such a taboo and secretive subject – after all who would know that women could be unhappy after having had a ‘bundle of joy’! It doesn’t make sense!
Thankfully one friend of mine helped explain to me why I might be experiencing these terrible and intrusive visions and thoughts, and it really helped me to rationalise and find answers. She told me that her perception of it was that anxiety grips onto what might happen, what could happen and therefore the mind behaves preemptively. When these images were flashing into my mind they were solely serving the purpose of protection. They were enabling me to stay on top of my game, detect every danger and put measures in place to protect both me and my baby. It wasn’t that I wanted to hurt him or myself – I was simply preparing for every eventuality. Including those that frightened me most. When you’re in charge of something so precious, fragile and dependent on you – you are likely to worry about what could happen to them and therefore put measures in place to keep them safe. This helped.
I also relied on writing, which is why I started [my] blog and have started it back up again: I am six weeks postpartum with my second baby and have been experiencing anxiety and intrusive thoughts like I did before. To be able to pen out my thoughts and feelings expels them from my heart and allows me to feel a little lighter. That, and my medication.
@betsybabydiaries, read full story here
Postpartum depression and anxiety is not something you should face alone, and the sooner you speak out about your symptoms, the sooner you can get the support you deserve. Despite how debilitating it can be, only about 15% of women experiencing PPD symptoms get professional help. We’ve gathered some resources if you or someone you know could use some guidance and support in their mental health journey
Postpartum Support International - Help for Moms and Dads
FAQ about Postpartum Depression from the ACOG
Postpartum Depression Support Groups in U.S. and Canada
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255
PANDA National Helpline in Australia: 1300 726 306
Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA): +1-800-662-4357
Thank you again, Betsy, for letting us share your words here. If you have a story of your motherhood experience -- whether humbling, honest, heartwarming, or LOL-worthy, that you'd like to share with us, please DM us at @baby2bodyofficial. We will never share any personal stories without written permission. Please know that stories shared here do not reflect Baby2Body's opinions directly, but are simply shared as a way for women in this community to connect, uplift, support, listen to, and learn from one another.
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